Revision of traditional roles: A multidimensional view of fatherhood

We began September by acknowledging Father’s Day. While we celebrate and express gratitude for the important father figures in our lives, we may also navigate complicated relationships, and encounter feelings of absence and loss.

Historically, it has been observed that the paradox of patriarchy is that whilst the father is regarded as ‘head’ of the family, he is at the same time limited from being a central figure within it. When it comes to parental involvement, fathers are consistently found to be less engaged with, accessible to, and responsible for their children. Fathers have often been narrowly characterised as providers of secondary parenting — such as financial resources, discipline, or gender role modelling — rather than as directly involved in the care and nurturing of their children’s development. Gradually, this is changing and there is greater recognition of the important role fathers have in the lives of their children.

The role of the father may be particularly socio-culturally sensitive and has undergone many revisions over time. Attention has been given to the unique role of fathers, with some evidence for fathers as exciting play partners who engage their children in boisterous, stimulating and emotionally intense play that encourages exploration, resilience to stress and being socially responsive. However, it is considered that children need not just a stimulating or authoritative father, but one that is also capable of nurturance and who can offer a loving space to the mother/partner, as well as be a source of comfort to the child.

Frosh (1997) emphasises that —

“to father a child requires something other than the traditional boundary-setting and prohibitive stance…but to reach out in a loving way requires a shift in masculine consciousness, involving not just some more gentleness but a whole gamut of alterations in relations of dependency, intimacy, vulnerability and trust. On the whole, the more fragile masculinity becomes, the more desperately men cling to its vestiges, doing the opposite of what fathering requires”.

A reliable finding is that the important dimensions of parental influence are those related to parental characteristics such as warmth, nurturance and closeness, rather than gender-related characteristics.

As we reflect on the complexities of fatherhood, we recognise the challenges many face, whether in being a father or in their relationship with their own father. Our dedicated team of psychologists is here to help you navigate these complexities with care and understanding.

September 2024